Hindrances to Fellowship

Eric and I have joined a small group with our church here in Northern VA. We are studying a book called Why Small Groups? In the book the author states that the four main goals of a small group according to Scripture should be progressive sanctification, mutual care, fellowship, and the ministry of the Holy Spirit.

Tonight we discussed fellowship. One thing that really opened my eyes was the following quote from the book "Fellowship is not (at least not necessarily) going to a Bible study with someone, or sharing doctrinal commitments, or attending a Christian men's rally where emotions run deep and passions are high. Fellowship is not found in a 'group therapy' session where participants reveal their darkest thoughts - even if everyone in the group is a Christian and brings a Bible. In fact, two Christians can be married to one another and still not experience fellowship." So, I thought to myself "If these things aren't fellowship then what is?"

According to the author fellowship defined by the New Testament is "participating together in the life and truth made possible by the Holy Spirit through our union with Christ. Fellowship is sharing something in common the deepest possible level of human relationship - our experience of God himself."

There have been times when I was in a small group setting , and I longed for this sort of fellowship and it was no where to be found. Then, there were there times when everything was just as it should be and everyone in the group was encouraged and challenged as we grew in our relationships with God. In the past, I thought the reason for this was that certain groups just clicked better than others. This is true, but it isn't the entire reason. Part of the reason is that small groups sometimes allow hindrances to block their fellowship. The following are the four hindrances to fellowship as outlined in the book:

1.) Self- sufficiency: This is when people feel that they don't need the other members of the group in order to grow in their relationship with God. "To say that we can become who God wants us to be without benefit of fellowship is as inaccurate as saying that a body can be fully functional without eyes or hands or ears."

2.) Formality: In other words, the rules and codes that we apply during social settings. Sometimes are meetings follow the same exact pattern. The same person leads, the same people share, and the same people pray. True fellowship is spiritual and so everyone should share what the Spirit leads them to share.

3.)Bitterness: A few examples from the book are the following: unfulfilled expectations (wanting certain people in the group to be friendly to us), offended pride, jealousy, and gossip and slander. These obvious sinful feelings are so common among man, but if left unchecked and unrepented for they will block godly fellowship within a group.

4.) Elitism: This is an attitude that believes "I am more spiritual than others in the group and couldn't possibly learn anything from them."

These four hindrances us are robbing of us the fellowship that God designed and wants for us to share among the body of believers. By being guard against such things and repenting of any areas that we are lacking in, we will surely experience the bonds of Christian fellowship that God has planned for his children.